THOSE FUCKING TEETH

SG2: I'M TIRED OF REFRESHING IGNO AND SEEING THESE BIG-ASS FUCKING TEETH AT THE TOP AND BOTTOM OF EVERY PAGE MAKE IT STOP AAAUGH

Mr. Bones: OH GOD THEY'RE ON THIS PAGE TOO

SG2: WHY ARE THEY SO CREEPY?! Seriously, it's not like they're showing the gross stained teeth. I remember a while back whenever I was uploading pics to my Photobucket that the ad in the corner was constantly this disgusting infected toenail or some such thing, and by comparison you'd think some nice, white teeth wouldn't be so bad. BUT THEY ARE!! SOMEHOW THOSE PARTICULAR PHOTOGRAPHS, BLOWN UP TO GIANT SIZE, PLASTERED AT THE TOP AND BOTTOM OF EVERY PAGE IS CREEPY AS FUCK AND I DON'T KNOW WHY BUT MAKE IT STOP

Reese: They're on this page too because zetaboards targets ads based on the topic title if not the posts as well. You said teeth, and now this thread is gonna have teeth advertisements. Speaking of teeth though, I'm royally pissed that I was not allowed to keep my wisdom teeth because they were "hazardous Materials". Hazardous Materials? Seriously? They're fucking teeth! They came from my head, not Chernobyl. I wanted so bad to make a pair of Gatsbyesque cufflinks, but no, the teeth nazis say no teeth for me. They're my own teeth. If I had a testicle removed, I'd say "yeah, whatever, throw it away", but teeth? What harm can they cause? I wanted them. I should sue for custody of my teeth.

SG2: Yeah but I started the thread BECAUSE they were already here...so what triggered them to be all over IGNO in the first place?

Katie: My teeth kinda hurt atm. Probably because I've been drinking soda and eating candy all day. Oops. *reminds self to use mouthwash tonight*

Karma: I do not see these infamous teeth ads

SG2: Then you're lucky. VERY lucky. I think I'm still getting them but I used a Firefox add-on that hides images to block them and save mein eyes. But I can still see the part of the ad that says 'feedback ads from google' and some of them still have the word 'teeth' in them... Even the word is almost enough to set the images off in my head now. But man. I never thought I'd be so terrified of teeth.

Angel: Oh god, now I have ads about toothpaste which 'provides relief for sensitive teeth' - however, no photos

SG2: Aside from on this thread, I think the teeth ads are finally gone, for me at least. But man, that was a scary week.

SG2: I take that back. Firefox was giving me problems and I loaded up IGNO in Google Chrome in the meantime, and the teeth are still plastering the page, at least for me.

Reese: They plague me in firefox as well!

Mr. Bones: DAMMIT THEY RETURNED GAHHHHH

SG2: THEY'RE BACK AND THEY'VE COME IN *ANIMATED GIF FORM* SOMEONE STOP THE MADNESS

LG: Those teeth don't even look like they were from the same people!

SG2: They don't even look like they came from a human!! Or at least from an ordinary, non-mutant human!! Seriously, those teeth are the scariest fucking things I've ever seen, and every time I think they're gone, they keep coming back!! This is clearly an evil plot against IGNO...but who is orchestrating this dental invasion?! That's the real question...

Informer X: First I would like to say "hahahahaha" because I use my phone to post and therefore don't see any ads at all. I'm safe from the teeth and any other sinister marketing pitches! As for the culprit of this plot, don't you see? Were doing this to ourselves somehow. The ads are generated based on info from the page and somehow when it looked at the page everything put together must have spelled teeth. There's something posted on igno that's making it happen. I don't think its this thread because if I understand correctly the teeth were there before this thread was together. So what could be causing it?!

SG2: That's exactly what I don't get. This thread was indeed made after the fact, in response to the sudden teeth ads appearing on the board. But typically, those ads respond to themes found in multiple places on the board, as though they describe the board's 'interests' (such as finding gamer talk and responding with gaming ads, which happens most often). But...where in the world did it get teeth from? Somehow, did it find one odd, passing mention of teeth to be so important that it needed to flood the board with teeth?! I don't get it... But it might not be working that way. I think sometimes they just pick 'new and popular' ads to display, not only feedback ads...because I've seen these same teeth on Photobucket and in my Hotmail, now, as well. And I sure know I'm not engaging in teeth discussion on either of those locales... SO WHY DO THE TEETH WISH TO INVADE OUR HUMBLE IGNOLAND

Informer X: Well what is it an ad for? Just teeth? Or is it for something else? (I can't see it so I don't know.)

SG2: Yes, it's an ad for just teeth. They're advertising teeth because they think the people of IGNO might possibly be interested in purchasing teeth. Teeth of all shapes and sizes, all colors, omnivore teeth, sharp, pointed fangs, vampire teeth, alligator teeth, you name it, they've got it. They're ads for the Teeth! Teeth! Teeth! Emporium. Stop by and trade in your boring, ordinary teeth for the teeth of your choosing today, 50% off!! (It's actually for teeth whitening, it's just that the close-up pictures they use are really creepy. Also I'm sure I just said 'teeth' enough times to make these ads even more forceful...)

Bradios: They're probably in alliance with those pesky garden gnomes!!!

EnjoyLov: i still haven't seen the teeth.

Mr. Bones: i would buy human teeth and make them into cufflinks like meyer wolfsheim from the great gatsby

Bradios: They are definitely in alliance with the Moosetopian/Garden Gnome Alliance (I know because they helped them try and take over my air temple).

SG2: The Moosetopians aren't really our enemies, Bradios. They're filthy traitors who isolate themselves from the rest of IGNOLand because they think they're so cool and superior. Still, they've never exactly attacked us before...Also, for those of you who haven't witnessed the horror of the teeth, I will have to screenshot and show you all right here on this thread. Not now, though - I'm in class with people behind me and I'd rather not terrify them with the horrific monstrosities we know as 'The Teeth'.

Bradios: Well, okay then, but I still stand by my signature!

EnjoyLov: Yeah like I was talking to Russell and he was telling me that I was one of the lucky ones that weren't able to see the teeth and he also told me that they were horrifying to look at.

SG2: THEY ARE NOT ORDINARY TEETH!!

Bradios: THEY ARE MUTANT TEETH FROM THE MYSTERIOUS BEYOND!!!!

LG: I went to a different site and those fucking teeth followed me!!!!

Bradios: CAN YOU SCREENSHOT THE TEETH?!

LG: Wait are you serious????? You curse the teeth that you have never seen!

Bradios: OH FUCK! AND THEY DARE TO FOLLOW YOU!

LG: Its scary!!!!!

Bradios: AND THEY DARE TO PUT IT AS YOUR SIGNATURE!

LG: Actually....That was me....

Bradios: DAMN YOU!

SG2: *removes the teeth from LG's signature* YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT THOSE TEETH LG I SEE THEM ENOUGH WITHOUT YOU MAKING ME LOOK AT THEM EVEN MORE THANK YOU *writes LG's name down next to XL's in the book of IGNOLand terrorists*

LG: HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE NOW I AM THE LORD OF THE TEETH!......Along with still being the master of pudding.

xL: Yay, LG is a terrorist with me.

Bradios: ACK! NEWBIES BECOMING TERRORISTS (EXCPET ME, I AM FOREVER LOYAL TO THE KAISER) WE WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!

LG: NO ONE CARES!!!! ....Wait now that my signature is gone.....I can't be a terrorist anymore.....Oh well....

Bradios: HAHA! PLAN FOILED!

LG: HAHA your still an idiot!

SG2:

Bradios: why do you do that all the time?

SG2: BECAUSE YOUR MEANS 'YOUR'!! YOU'RE MEANS 'YOU ARE'!! GOD DAMMIT @#$%FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

FFFFFGSFDS *RAMPAGE*

Bradios: ACK!

xL: ¦¦¯¯ ¦¦¯¦ ¦¦ ¦¦¯¯ ¦¦¦¯¯ ¦¦¯¦ ¦¦ ¦¦
¦¦¯¯ ¦¦¯¯ ¦¦ ¦¦ ¦¦¦¦¦¯¯ ¦¦¯¦ ¦¦ ¦¦
¦¯¯¯ ¦¯ ¦¦¦¯ ¦¯¯¯ ¦¦¯ ¦¦¦¯¦¯ ¦¯ ¦¯¯¯

EnjoyLov: I was posting like a minute ago on one of the threads and I saw teeth...I can't seem to get rid of them...But now that I am here on this thread I don't see them. I don't get it.

SG2: Now that they know you're onto them, they're getting stealthy about it. ...obviously

Bradios: There is only 1 final solution: DEATH TO THE TEETH!!!!

SG2:

LG: What?????

Bradios: You sayin' I'm a nazi?!

SG2: facepalm.jpg

Mr. Bones: maybe is isn't a Nazi maybe he is allied with the garden gnomes

Bradios: Care to see my signature? *points to 'the air temple creed'* I want to KILL all the enemies of IGNOLand, I don't want to BE one!

SG2: Or is that just a front? It's what you WANT us to think as you secretly conspire with the Garden Gnomes, isn't it?! Admit it!! I should have guessed...you're Australian. Clearly, all of Australia is allied with the gnomes...the gnome home base is in AussieLand...why else would Angel be the one who started that epic meme in the first place?! She is queen of the gnomes and has been trying to spread your even brand of Australian lawn ornament-based evil for years!!

Bradios: SG2! I feel betrayed by the fact that YOU of all users would actually ACCUSE me of conspiring with those god damned garden gnomes!!!!

Mr. Bones: hey dont try to flip the blame and guilt onto us you australians and your backwards flushing toilets

Bradios: Yosh blast it, man! i am not with the garden gnomes!

Mr. Bones: LIES YOUR ACCENT SPEAKS THE TRUTH

Bradios: to tell you the truth, in real life i have more of an american accent!

SG2: PICS PROOF OF VOICE OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN

Bradios: sound or video?

SG2: Either or, but we need proof that this is you talking, so you must identify yourself as Bradios and speak for us. Possibly toss in an IGNO meme or two as proof.

Bradios: ok. Wait a minute, do I HAVE to put in IGNO memes?

SG2: Not necessary, but it would be helpful in proving your identity and the fact that you are not a terrorist conspiring with the gnomes!!

Bradios: it's gonna be hard, but the first 2 that come to my head i shall use.

SG2: You do know that stuff like the teeth and the gnomes and things like that are IGNO memes, right?

Bradios: Yeah! But I must warn you, if you like a fictonal story about flying goats and how I saw one use a goat condom while I (badly) retell it, then watch it. But it seems I can't upload my file because it's too huge!

SG2:

1-Megaupload.com
2-Post link
3-???
4-Profit!!

Bradios: Ok here it is (sorry if it's quick, stupid size limit)

Attached to this post:

Untitled_23.wmv (200.58 KB)

SG2: That sounds pretty Australian to me. YOU'RE WITH THE GNOMES, CONFESS!!!!

Bradios: I TELL YOU AGAIN I AM NOT CONSPIRING WITH THE GARDEN GNOMES! IF I DID I WOULD HAVE TOLD YOU BY NOW!

Mr. Bones: sounds like you're trying to convince me. why would an innocent man need to convince me?

LG: OMG HE'S WITH THE GARDEN GNOMES!?!?!?!?!

Mr. Bones: EXACTLY

Reese: The video crashed firefox. QQ Damn brother stealing all the tubes!

SG2: OR did the video crash Firefox because Bradios intentionally orchestrated it as a terrorist attack against your internets?! THE EVIDENCE IS REALLY STARTING TO STACK UP AGAINST YOU PAL

Bradios: LISTEN TO ME AS HARD AS YOU CAN! I..AM...NOT...WITH...THE... GARDEN GNOMES! I HATE THERE FUCKING GUTS!

SG2:

Mr. Bones: you say it but you have yet to provide evidence to support it

EnjoyLov: I was reading a thread just like a minute or so ago and I saw the teeth and it was horrifying to see them. I also keep seeing the IMV advertisements and the other one that says I think I am in love. But the one with the teeth are so horrifying to see.

Bradios: I'VE PROVED IT OVER A THOUSAND TIMES BUT YOU JUST WONT LISTEN!!!!

SG2: DENIAL DOES NOT CONSTITUTE AS PROOF

Bradios: IF I WAS WITH THE GARDEN GNOMES, WHY WOULD I KILL THOUSANDS UPON THOUSANDS OF THEM SO MANY TIMES!

SG2: You are killing Lawn Elves and pretending to kill Garden Gnomes. Obviously.

Bradios: NO THAT IS NOT IT! I KILL GARDEN GNOMES!!!!

Mr. Bones: LIES

SG2: You seem awfully defensive for an innocent man.

Bradios: WELL YOUR ALL ACCUSING ME WHEN YOU ALL KNOW I HATE THEM !

SG2:

Bradios: okay, I'm calm... *BLEH* I'm calm.

xXkakashi-soul-reaper-ninjaXx: I DUN KNOW Y U GUIES DONT LIEK TEH THEH THAY MAEK M3 AL KUSO!!11!! LOL I LUV TETH LIEK IN A NIPONSA BUKKAKE VIEDO WIT AL TEH JISU AND LIEK BRAECS R T3H HAWTNEZ I!1!1!! LOL LUV JAPAENS3 PORN CUZ TEH GUYS R AL LIEK DYNAMIKKU ENTORIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!111!1!11!!1!!!1!!111!11111! AND THE LOLI IS ALL LIEK IKU WA YO IKU WA YO OMG WTF

Mr. Bones:

SG2: I lol'd at the whole post. Hard. During class. When we were talking about the holocaust. I probably shouldn't have been on IGNO. Oh, Russell, you are one epic troll.

Reese: Lol, newfags don't know how to read tinytext!

SG2: Sssh!! Don't spoil it, now!!

xXkakashi-soul-reaper-ninjaXx: LOL SPOIL WUT LOL?111!?!??!11111!!????11!1 WTF LOL

Bradios: i lol'd for 30 minutes on that post

LG:

Bradios: PROOF OR I DIDN'T HAPPEN!

SG2: You didn't happen? What, did your mother ask xXkakashi-soul-raperXx for a paternity test? OH BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURN!!

Bradios: SG2 that was insulting and i feel offended!

Reese: You walked right into that one Bradios. We've all gone through it. me and Lemmy especially with our abundant typos. It's all in fun and games. Just wait until one of us slips up, then you can take advantage!

Bradios: yeah i guess..

LG: OMG I HAVE PROOF HE'S WITH THE GNOMES!!!!!

Spoiler

It's poorly drawn proof!!!!!

Mr. Bones: proof enough for me

Bradios: A PICTURE USING MS PAINT DOES NOT COUNT AS FUCKING PROOF LG!

Mr. Bones: IRL no but on the internet that is as good as a photograph over9000 hours in mspaint well spent

Bradios: YOU TRUST A DAMN POORLY DRAWN MS PAINT PICTURE OVER THE TRUTH OF ONE OF YOUR OWN MEMBER'S?!

SG2: Yes. I mean hey, LG is IGNOLand's official private investigator (as of this post). It can't be helped that he costs the cheapest, and that's why we hired him. After all, the Kaiser doesn't tax her citizens money, she taxes them blood. We don't have the funds to just toss around frivolously, and it's LG's job, so I trust he knows what he's doing. If he says that is photographic evidence, I have no other choice than to believe him!!

Reese: I'm not sure, but I think this might be a shoop. I can tell from from the pixels and from seeing quite a few shops in my day.

SG2: OMG RUSSELL WINS YET ANOTHER THREAD YOU GET AWESOMENESS POINTS FOR BEING ON FIRE LATELY

Reese: FUCK YEAH, SEAKING!

Bradios: GUYS! I AM NOT WITH THE GARDEN GNOMES!!!! HOW MANY TIMES TO I HAVE TO SAY THIS UNTIL YOU BELIEVE ME?!!!!

Mr. Bones: /facepalm.jpg why are you trying so hard to convince us of this? if you truly are innocent you shouldn't need to

SG2: What John said.

Bradios: You know what Bones said is right, i dont need to prove it if im already innocent

SG2: Well, NOW you do, because your constant denial has made you even more suspicious, and I think we're gonna need some proof besides 'GUISE I SWAREZ I'M NOT WITH TEH GN0MEZ!!111ONE!' to be convinced of your innocence...

Bradios: What do you mean to say?

LG: As the detective of IGNOLand I will make sure to get on this case!

EnjoyLov: so do you think I am part of the garden gnomes or not (I am not for the record)?

LG: Mmmmmmmmm I don't know but I shall figure out if you are.

SG2: See guise, it's when you say things like 'by the way I'm totally not with the gnomes for the record' that you become suspicious. Julie is very suspicious to me right now... ...also...has anyone else...stopped getting the teeth ads...and is now getting...gay ads...or is that just me...?

LG: I keep getting the crazy test ads....

Bradios: Yeah im getting those kinds of ads too!

SG2: Huh... ...because mine are really... ... Gay... Which I kinda understand because of all this talk of Penis Sex around here lately, but...

LG: PENIS SEX RULES!!!

SG2: Hey, what th... *looks at previous post* ... WHY THE HELL DIDN'T PENIS GET FILTERED IN MY LAST POST?! Edit: THIS ONE EITHER!!

EnjoyLov: I haven't seen any of the teeth ads either but I have been seeing some weird ads lately... Me suspicious to you SG2? From now on I am going to keep my mouth shut about the garden gnomes and let you think other people are part of the garden gnomes. And LG must really enjoy if you want to say that of the PENIS Sex. Lets see if this gets coded out. Mine got filtered.

SG2: But now ever since I fixed the code there's a really thick red border around the text now instead of just the background color...

SG2: So after months of their absence, I JUST SAW THEM AGAIN. And on another website, as well. They're making a comeback...and they're bringing along this provocatively-posed woman inviting me to play some game called 'Evony' that is no doubt some sort of erotic RPG because it says I can 'play now in my browser discreetly'... BUT THE TEETH!!

Hamel: and strangely I have never seen those on here before.

SG2: THEN GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES AND PRAISE WHATEVER GOD YOU HOLD DEAR. Srsly though I haven't seen them on IGNO for a few months now, but they keep popping up all the time elsewhere. And, being the horrific sins against nature and all things holy that they are, they never seem to stay blocked no matter how many times I tell Firefox to block those sites...that, or Firefox is doing its job just fine, but the teeth are invading so many sites that every time I block one two more appear in its place. FUCK.

Reese:

<html><b><i><u><s>pooop fart!!!!</s></u></i></b></html>

LG: ....They're.......BACK ON IGNO!!!!!!

SG2: Dammit Russell, of all the threads to test HTML on, why did you have to bump THIS one?!

Bradios: Really? I'm not seeing them in here.

Tim: Ahhhh!!! I see them!!!! *hides*

EnjoyLov: I haven't seen the teeth in a long time. I guess that is a good a thing.