IGNO Logic

Reese: I'm amazed at the different types of logic used on IGNO. For instance: I use plain old regular Logic (most of the time) Aibou uses Aibou-Logic Karma uses Karma-Logic Andrew uses misologic and/or pseudologic So, yeah. Discuss.

Aibou:

Reese: Chocolate covered logic. People: Rejoice!

Aibou: *stab* Victim: *chokesputter* ...I-I... see...*faint*

***WARNING: DESCRIPTIVE, ORDERLY REASONING AT WORK***

Karma: I'm awesome. I win. People: You win.

Andrew: \v/>,<\v/! People: \v/>,<\v/!!

People: HOW? Mech: I'm a Mech.

FINISH HIM! SG2: *CHAINSAW* ***WHAT?*** I CAN'T FUCKING HEAR YOU. Victim: *KO* SG2: EXACTLY.

Lemmy: GOTEN. Angel: GOTEN.

Angel: GOTEN. Lemmy: GOTEN.

Goat: CONDOMS.

Manky: *flings poop* Crowd: *disperses*

Exactly. EDIT://Z0MG I FORGOT SOMEONE LET ME TAKE A WILD GUESS.

Corey: Sex?

SG2: So...much...logical...logic...

Karma: Aibou got me spot-on, I'm amazed. Good job! You forgot the part where I'm a genius, though.

Reese: lol, wow. SG2 was right about her.

Aibou: sness is implied within awesomeness. O WAIT EYE 4GOT SUMTHING GUYZ.

Karma: BAN-CHAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

SG2: AIBOU TOTALLY FUCKIN' WINS A COOKIE FOR THAT.

Aibou: EEEEEEEE COOKIE *GLOMPCLINGMUNCHMUNCHMUNCH*

Reese: well, this is totally not what I expected.

SG2: Serves you right for still not learning that you expect the unexpected on IGNO.

Reese: bbut I was expecting the unexpected because wahat happened was to be expected so I expected the not expected which would normally be expected but not on IGNO, so the expected was unexpected and replaced with the unexpected.... PARADOX!!!

Aibou: HISS! *KILLS REESE* PARADOX. </3

Reese: You can't kill me, I can't die as long as Karma is alive, and Karma cannot die. PARADOX!!!

Aibou: . . . *twiiiitch* Must... i-incapacitate...

SG2: *waves the chocolate diamond*

Aibou: HATE HATE OMG HATE YOU DIE NOW I WILL KILL YOU IN THE FACE *KILLMAIMDESTROYANNIHILATE* DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE

SG2:

Aibou: *SWALLOWS CHAINSAW*

Crisis: ...wow I didn't see that one coming. Sword swallowing, i can see. Chainsaws, not so much

SG2: So how're those torn-up insides treatin' ya about now, mm? Not to mention how you intend to get that one OUT of your body...

Aibou: ... *burp* @_@; I feel like Majin Buu.

Reese: *Cringes at DBZ reference*

Coriander Mankey: speaking of, did u all see that pic of Freeza I posted in the "Bad Characters" thread under anime... ^_^ It IS freeza...I SWAREz!

Lemmy: I did see that; it was so totally Freeza. I remember watching Ryūsei Nakao's awesome voice come out of the mouth of a character that looked JUST LIKE THAT. ZOMG LOOK I RUSH TO MAKE THIS IT'S MEWTWO.

I SWEARZ.

Crisis: *dons the jacket of the infamous Lost Club*

Lemmy: THEY CONSPIRE AGAINST YOU, OTHER ALEX. No, seriously; they do. Aibou, does that image come as a print for a clothing article or wallscroll?

Aibou: <,<;;; It's listed as a print on dA 'cause some random person wanted it to be, but I doubt it would pass the quality test.

Lemmy: Is it for SALE, though.

Cumtastic:

*lost club recruiter enters room*

Recruiter- Free Jackets for anyone who is officially lost.

Me- ooh ME ME

Recruiter- sign here *pointing at contract*

*Me- signs and takes jacket from recruiter*

Recruiter- Now we own your soul.. have fun.

Me- I gots a jacket.. a jacket.. a jacket.. wait. But the red-headed jewish boy already owns my soul.

Crisis: ...Where is this Red Haired Jewish boy? We need to locate him, stalk him until he reveals the postion of your soul, sneak i and take half (if not all, depending on the doom bunny ninja deployed), and than own some of your soul. If you haven't noticed, me and Karma made the lost club

Cumtastic: But I'm special... cuz i was recuited.. and thus WANTED

SG2: Ladies and gentlemen I bring to you some brilliant IGNO logic and clearly, I win. Observe.

Crisis: to think that the preceding mess was all because i wanted a third party person to give input on a debate Russell and i had on Phil's Epic Fail. The Jury is still out on that one.

Reese: That's the true measure of IGNO Logic. Like I was thinking, it seems SG2 did give us some insight by supporting one of the competing theories as to why phil is possible. (okay, so the theories were only competing in my mind, sue me) I thought that either failing at failing does not equal succeeding, or that it is possible to both fail and succeed at the same time. SG2 would seem to suport theory number 2.

Crisis: Yet, her definition of "epic fail" is paradoxal in its own way. People who are epic fail naturally fail at all endevours, as she agrees, shortly before stating that there is an acception to the epic fail that is Phil, namely his films. So, somehow by SG2's thinking, finding one thing where he does not fail does not discout him as epic fail man. By my own, and possibly Russell's, logic, the exhistance of something he does not fail at makes Phil a non epic fail, something that i term as a legendary fail, due to the lack of required conditions on the epic fail field.

Reese: Dued, give it up before you're just a smoldering slag heap.

SG2: I rest my case.

Lemmy: That right there is all the logic you need to make your argument. You're way, way too considerate to have written up all those pointless paragraphs when you've got that Admin Gun that puts holes in people's heads . . .

Karma: I FEAR NOT THE ADMIN GUN

SG2: WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY, BITCH?!

Karma: YOU HEARD ME.

SG2: *SUPER ADMIN GUN*

Karma: *SUPER TOTALLY UNAFFECTED*

SG2: What th...THAT'S NOT FAIR!! AND STOP COLORING EVERYTHING IN YELLOW!!! IT'S NOT YOUR COLOR!!!

Crisis: So, whose color is Yellow? If it's not Karma's, then it is implied that someone else has laid claim to said color... Damn... Yellow is my color, isn't it?

SG2: Yours is like...off-yellow-ish. I used Yellow when the skin was orange but that was a temp-color. But you're the closest to Yellow. Also you have a lot of Yellow in your sig. I DEMAND KARMA AND OTHER ALEX FIGHT TO THE DEATH OVER THE COLOR YELLOW ONETWOTHREEREADYSETGOGOGO!!!!!

Karma: I could always slip to orange you know, that's blue's complement.

SG2: NO. IT'S TAKEN, BITCH.

Cumtastic: *does jacket dance* I got a Jacket.. a jack-et.. a jack-et woohoo.. a jack-et Also, red-headed Jewish kid with my soul originally got it for giving me change for a fiver... asked for it back... he refused.

SG2: ...Wait huh? *puts on own jacket*

Lemmy: And you learned one of Life's Little Lessons as a result, ne?

SG2: I'm going to go to the store... And I'm going to buy the bestest, most awesomest jacket. I'm going to wear it through all the seasons, through cold, through heat. I'm going to sleep in the jacket...I may even have to shower in the jacket. That is how awesome my jacket will be. And it will proclaim, to one, to all... That I have no idea what the Hell is going on in this thread.

Cumtastic: Sorry SG2. I got us on the topic of jackets. Also, today Steph barrowed my jacket and she was about to leave.

Me: Don't you dare Jack it.

Steph: ....

Me: My Jacket don't Jack it. *cracked up*

Reese: lol, that's sooo the kind of thing I'd say, and then I'd laugh, and no one else would even get it. sigh.

Cumtastic: OMg.. I think this is the start of a beautiful and unmatched perverted friendship

SG2: You know, that would actually make more sense as in to say 'don't jack it' meaning 'don't steal it', rather than something like...I mean, logically it just makes no...I mean, come on, how wo... ...You know what nevermind, I don't know why I'm even trying.

Cumtastic: I realized it didn't make sense but.. it was the repeating... that cracked me up

Reese: Yay, I have friends!!!! (oh, and thanks for last night, it was highly educational) Wait, I thought it made sense. She may not have been "stealing" it per say but she was still taking it, and that fits my definition of jacking, especially so if she didn'y ask. If there was something other than that that didn't make sense then I'm just gonna go be an hero.

SG2: That's the type of jacking I thought would make sense, too, which is what I thought of when I read her first post. But then when she mentioned a 'perverted' friendship I thought she was implying 'jacking' to mean something else...which, in the context, would make absolutely no effing sense, and... ...Oh, my poor, dear, sweet IGNO, I won't let them take you, I promise I won't... WHERE IS KARMAAAAAAAAAAAA?!

Cumtastic: no the perverted part was from the whole knowing Russell thing.

Karma: HERE I IS!

Reese: MASTER, you return!

Karma: I have, my good minion. But I hear you've turned into some sort of unspeakable monstrosity known only as a /b/tard. This shall have to be remedied.

Reese: As you command master, I shall do my best.

Karma: Good boy. Here's a cookie. *hands him a cookie*

Reese: *claps hands* YAY a cookie! *devours cookie*

SG2: If you don't manage to un-/b/tard yourself, though...you'll have failed your master. You know the consequences of that. I don't, but I assume you do.

Karma: Nice threat there.

SG2: Well I'm not the one who'd be punishing him so what's it matter?

Karma: I suppose.

Reese: Hmmm, what if I'm just a closet /b/tard and nobody find out?

Karma: ....Hm... As long as you don't spread your /b/tardness around and can manage to act what passes for "normal" on the board, I suppose I can let it slide. But I'm keeping my eye on you I hope you know.

Reese: Yes Master of course Master.

Karma: Good boy. Good Russell. *gives him another cookie*

Reese: YAY COOKIES! *dovours cookie in a comical anime-ish manner*

Karma: Such a good little minion.

SG2: Slave!!

Reese: I am not a slave! I get paid in cookies!

SG2: Slave cookies.

Cumtastic: mmm slave cookies.. made of SLAVES.. what can be bad about those?

SG2: Lemmy gives me serf cookies. Made of serfs. But I prefer the mermaid pizza.

Reese: meh, slave cookies are still cookies.

Cumtastic: dolphin eggs are still bomb.. even when you eat them in a room full of gnomes.. you juat have to watch so you don't get jumped.

SG2: I so need to make that IGNO Meme thread. We need a constant, ever-updated list.

Reese: *sneaks out of room*

Karma: He's not a slave! He's a minion! There's a difference!

Mr. Bones: suuuuuuuuurrrrrreeeeeeee there is

Karma: Straight from Dictionary.com:

Slave: 1. a person who is the property of and wholly subject to another; a bond servant. 2. a person entirely under the domination of some influence or person: a slave to a drug.

Minion: 1. a servile follower or subordinate of a person in power. 2. a favored or highly regarded person. 3. a minor official.

Clearly there is a difference. Minions get more respect. So HAH.

Reese: That's right I'm not in bondage to anyone!

SG2:

Cumtastic: well, if that's not a deal breaker... I donno what is.

Reese: Slavery bondage not, well you know..

Crisis: What my tounge tied and girl shy friend means to say is that he is not enslaved to the will of another at this moment in time.

Karma: Though admittedly he is bound to serve me through that vampirical pact he made with me, but that was of his own choosing. I didn't force him to become my minion against his will.

Reese: Yep, I sold most of my free will for power! But the connection works both ways so if I really wnted to I could become the dominant one in the relationship, that is if I could win a battle of wills. But I have no such intentions, I'm more powerful, protected by an invincible master, oh and cookies, don't forget the cookies.

SG2: Uh-oh, that sounds like a free-minded and potentially rebellious minion to me...

Reese: You take that out of context, if she carefully reads the whole post, there's no need for alarm. You're just jealous that I get cookies.

SG2: You take MINE out of context. You imply a contentness for the time being but also a freedom of will that's never trustworthy in a minion. I sense this as a potential - note that I did use that word - for rebellion.

Karma: I wouldn't have made him my minion if I didn't trust him. And anyway if he starts getting out of line I'll just maul him and help myself to his blood afterwards. But I don't think I have anything to worry about. The benefits for him are just too good to bother trying to cross me. *gives Russell another cookie*

SG2: If you keep giving him cookies the way you have been, and he betrays you, and you drink up all his traitorous blood, then you're gonna regret it, because you'll wind up with extremely high blood sugar.

Aibou: *kills Reese* *steals cookies* *eats* K. No danger of that now.

SG2: ... And let me guess. Just because IGNO is built around making ME suffer... Aibou's not gonna get chastised for stealing Russell's cookies, even though she KILLED him... When I've always just...stolen the cookies. Maybe made him cry. But he's always kept his life. Just watch, I totally see this coming.

Aibou: It is inevitable. ... ...And now it's not, because I said it was. ...And now it is, because I said it's not with a disclaimer. PARADOX.

Cumtastic: uh.. Russell.. I like cookies.. may I have one?

SG2: ...Pretty sure if you were paying attention, Aibou killed teh Russell...

Lemmy: Which means the source of all stolen cookies is dead. SG2, whatever will you do?

Reese: *stands uo, pulls knife out of chest, licks it clean* Mmmmm, I taste gooooood. Well CT you could have a cookies but somebody, well two somebodys stole them all and eated them.

Karma: Except for that ONE CRUCIAL FACT that Russell can't DIE. So no, no punishment. *gives CT some cookies*

SG2: Um...where do you think he's getting the cookies? The obvious answer is go after the source of the cookies. AKA Karma. Also looks to me like he did, because Aibou has the power to...kill Russell. he just sorta came back to life after the aforementioned killing.

Reese: When did this happen? Karma can't be likked, so by extension, neither can I. Just badly maimed and wounded, but then I heal so no big.

SG2: Karma can't be...w-what now...?

Reese: KILLED, I said KILLED!

SG2: That don't look like no 'killed' to me...

Karma: Technically 'licked' still makes sense.

Aibou: ..............................................................O,O IT'S A PINATA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *TACKLES REESE*

Reese: GAH!

Aibou: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE X9000* GIVE IT.

Reese: Give *gasp* what?

SG2: ...Apparently killing you wasn't successful for her so she's trying to...squeeze the cookies out of you.

Cumtastic: YAY! cookies. I love cookies.. and I love Karma. Karma is now one of my favorite people *bows to Karma* right next to Moosey and Reese.

Aibou: ; ; THEY HAVE TO COME OUT EVENTUALLY!

Cumtastic: not.. necessarily

Crisis: Oh, they will come out if you squeeze hard enough. It's simply a matter of if they're still cookies when you come out...

Cumtastic: *does ew dance*

Reese: Jeez *summons cookies* there.

Aibou: EEEEE COOKIE *GLOMP*

Karma: I am rather curious as to where you obtained this power, minion...

SG2: ... I dun want the cookies no mores.

Karma: You confuse me. You don't want them in this instance but you were perfectly willing to steal digested cookie mush from my stomach the other day. WTF.

Reese: Gah, my spine!!! Oh and I can summon cookies because I'm a necromancer, I chose to give up transmutation, illusion, and divination in order to specialize in necromancy. But I can still use abjuration, conjuration, enchantment, and evocation magic.

Crisis: ...I thought there was a rule about giving up divination, cause it had something like 3 or spells in the field. Also, you only need to give up one field to be a spec mage Russ.

Reese: Oh, woops, my bad, I didn't give up divination, but you still have to give up two schools to specialize. I forgot to adjust for 3.5 rules.

Crisis: in 3.5, diviners give up 1 school, to compensate for the lack of a useful spec school.

SG2: ...Necroma...WTF, are they dead cookies?!

Cumtastic: *doesn't care* coooooookie... plllleeeeeaaaaasseee?

Reese: But I'm not a diviner I'm a necromancer. And they're not dead cookies, I can still use conjuration magic to summon cookies. *gives CT cookies*

SG2: ...But if you're NECROmancing the cookies, doesn't that mean you're conjuring animated dead ones? ...and if it's a cookie, would a dead cookie be a pile of digested cookie mush...? Because that's gross.

Lemmy: Depends on how desperate you are. Would you reject digested cookie mush if you were weak from starvation and had no other choice? Aha, these . . . see, these are the questions.

Cumtastic: I love cookies... *jumps in cookie mush*.. mmm. tastes like cookies...that are cooked with the texture of cookie dough.

SG2: But they have been digested in someone else's stomach acid...and...regurgiated... Pretty sure most cookie dough does not follow these principles. ... ... I hope

Cumtastic: now I have you THINKING about it.. don't I? DON'T I? no.. Russell is soo good that he seperated the cookies from the acid and bodily fluids... *holds out hand of cookie mush* want some?

SG2: I don't believe you. You eat it first.